chanaleh: (Default)
I have developed a new metric: If you have to depend on guilt-tripping to pressure me into what should otherwise be a mutually beneficial transaction (join your group, attend your event, buy your product), then your system has bigger problems than my involvement will fix.

In tangentially related advice, a friend posted this to Facebook this morning:

Instead of Saying “I Don’t Have Time,” Say “It’s Not a Priority”
http://lifehacker.com/5892948/instead-of-saying-i-dont-have-time-say-its-not-a-priority

This is another really important principle that I have derived for myself over the past year or two. You always "have" time. The determining factor is what you choose to do with it. In some cases, of course, there are major constraints already in place, but those, too, derive from your own choices. This isn't to say that you should be wiilling or able to "make time" for everything -- you can't and you shouldn't. But I know that for myself, it's all too easy to hand over that control to some set of outside forces and cast myself in a chronically passive role. Reclaim your agency.

Note that several of the comments to that article (I know, never read the comments) take the stance "Oh, yeah, if I tried that at work I'd get fired, stat." Which is true enough -- and in the workplace, especially when your role is to serve other constituents, that's a matter of tact and diplomacy. What's more relevant here is the story you tell yourself about what you do and don't find the time to do.

Linkfest

Monday, February 6th, 2012 07:43 am
chanaleh: (Default)
I've been wanting for days and days to write some stuff about what's happening on my interior landscape, but have been too busy churning out actual work (made some updates to my website, though, alongside working on the big book project). So, in lieu of content, you get some of the interesting things that have come up in the past several weeks.

Design & typography

Beautiful and colorful, both from This Is Colossal:
The Chromatic Typewriter: http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2011/12/the-chromatic-typewriter/?src=footer
A Massive Black Field of Cut Steel Plants Hides a Colorful Secret: http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2012/01/a-massive-field-of-cut-steel-plants-reveals-a-colorful-secret/

The Met has a new section on their (recently overhauled) website called "Connections", a long series of thematic presentations with voiceovers by various Museum personnel and specialists. It's really nice.
http://www.metmuseum.org/connections/

Of historical interest, courtesy of [livejournal.com profile] c1: a film about Linotype (click to read about/see the trailer if you don't know what that is) that premiered in NYC this past weekend:
http://laughingsquid.com/linotype-the-film/

"How to Build a Newsroom Time Machine": Typesetting and layout the old-fashioned way, or, what "on the pasteboard" really means (probably also courtesy of [livejournal.com profile] c1, though it's been so long I forget!):
http://journoterrorist.com/2011/08/02/paperball2/

Writing

Gotham Writer's Workshop offers FREE writing classes! (well, one-hour workshops, but it could be fun):
http://www.writingclasses.com/CommunityEvents/index.php

An old one from Neil Gaiman about how to get published and/or how to get an agent:
http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2005/01/everything-you-wanted-to-know-about.asp

Work

Fascinating:
Scaling back consumption in service of happiness:
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/08/business/08consume.html?_r=1&hpw=&pagewanted=all
See also: http://finance.yahoo.com/news/the-case-for-a-21-hour-work-week.html

Useful:
http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifehack/the-100-best-lifehacks-of-2011-the-year-in-review.html
(srsly, read only the ones that you find interesting! Skip the rest!)

Relationships

Unbelievably beautiful:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/arjuna-ardagh/goddess-worship_b_660896.html

Insightful:
http://www.marcandangel.com/2011/12/11/30-things-to-stop-doing-to-yourself/
http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/naming-elephants-10-ways-to-use-radical-honesty-to-improve-your-relationship.html

Not really so insightful, but several people pointed me at it:
http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2012/01/20/the-gingrich-question-cheating-vs-open-marriage/

Mmm!

Scotch tastings in NYC:
http://nycwhisky.com/events-old

Star Wars

I forget who pointed me at this, but I am totally loving it (and I'm on about page 52 of 600+ and counting -- they just got up to Episode IV last month).
Darths & Droids is an "RPG screencap comic" that re-envisions Star Wars: Episode I (The Saga Begins) as a roleplaying campaign. Apparently inspired by DM of the Rings, but funnier in terms of making sense of the weaknesses of the source material.
http://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/0001.html

This reminds me that I also wanted to post this link when it first came to my attention several months ago:
Secret History of Star Wars: A Tribute to Marcia Lucas
http://secrethistoryofstarwars.com/marcialucas.html

Jewish

Jewish Sacred Theatre – Its Components and Its Means:
http://www.jewish-theatre.com/visitor/article_display.aspx?articleID=525

A handy nuts-and-bolts link on kashering your kitchen:
http://njop.org/resources/kosher/how-to-keep-kosher/
chanaleh: (chanukah)
In honor of the last night of Chanukah! Actually, this is not necessarily my top 8, but it is the 8 I will bring to your attention for this year. :-)

1. Aish HaTorah's Chanukah Jewish Rock of Ages - Official Hanukkah Song (Video):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KyKWUpSMegE

2. The Maccabeats do Matisyahu's "Miracle" (in conjunction with Be the Match):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHwyTxxQHmQ

3. Six13's "Chanukah Rights!":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOe0mJbs9WM

4. Ein Prat Fountainheads' Matrix-themed "Light Up The Night":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jzh-TKzXN2k

5. My new-favorite solstice-themed Chanukah song, "Banu Choshech":
(take your pick of the intelligible yet cheesy family-sung animated version or the hot hot Israeli folk-rocker version; both have their merits)

6. Jon Stewart & Stephen Colbert Sing About Hanukkah (just for [livejournal.com profile] justom):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gK0b_4bBW0I

7. The South Park Dreidel Song (you'll never hear it the same way again):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sL7NZzVVXxg
(but see this one for the assembled lyrics)

8. Tom Lehrer's "I'm Spending Hanukkah In Santa Monica" (oft-covered by a cappella groups, but I'm sending you to actual Lehrer):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSCmZU0eFJg

.... and a very happy [livejournal.com profile] chanaleh to you all!
chanaleh: Snoopy at the typewriter, pondering (snoopywriter)
Today is a day for getting things done and catching up in various ways, which at the moment includes this LJ post. (I got some of the more pressing things done earlier this week, partly as a result of bailing on getting together with [livejournal.com profile] c1 on Thursday evening -- sorry, but it did help!)

house things )

I'm going to be vending at a Judaica [art and] Craft Show at Havurat Shalom (on College Ave.) on Sunday, March 6, noon to 6pm. I will mostly be selling my artwork (plus some jewelry and MuffinButtons) -- and have been working on a couple new pieces that are not yet up on my website, so you should all come by to check them out!

work things )

theatre things, or lack thereof )

Last night I missed [livejournal.com profile] sen_ichi_rei's birthday as well as the Hot Foods Party because an Honorable Menschen potluck got scheduled for the same night... and what do you know, it was a lovely time. We sat around and schmoozed, and then we got started singing -- Billy Joel and Simon & Garfunkel and the Beatles and then Jewish liturgy and camp songs -- and it was overall the happiest I've felt in months about being in the group. So while I had meant to put in a cursory appearance and then zoom around to other events, I stayed until 11:30pm and then went home to bed, and I apologize to everyone I missed elsewhere.

Lastly: I've been in a bit of a funk the last couple weeks, although it's better since I got some good amateur therapy from Barbara on Friday night before Shabbat services. :-) But also on Friday, it happened that I started browsing Gretchen Rubin's Happiness Project blog, and believe it or not, just reading some of her posts actually made me start feeling a little better and more in control of life -- in other words, well, inspired. some of the good ones )

And now I'm going to go clean the kitchen and run some errands before my afternoon slips away and it's time to head to Menschen rehearsal.
chanaleh: (buttongirl)
Someone on my friendslist just posted (locked) a link to a 10-year-old article by Malcolm Gladwell, of Tipping Point fame, about a woman named Lois Weisberg (see also the print-friendly PDF) and the social role of Those People Who Know Everyone. It's a very enjoyable article, and reminded me somewhat of my Coworker M, whose job it apparently is to know everyone from the ground up in the Boston Jewish community (and he does it amazingly).

It reminded me also that a friend of a friend sent me a Facebook message some weeks back, and I (amused) promised to follow up but forgot until now:

You're a bit of a supernode, so I thought I might check with you: do you know any local bridge players? A bridge-playing couple would be ideal, but even one or two spare would be handy.

So? Who's out there? (Preferably in the Boston area, I believe was the point.) Help me earn my reputation. :-)

The Simple Dollar

Wednesday, June 9th, 2010 10:54 pm
chanaleh: (reading)
After getting dismissed early from rehearsal tonight, I made a grocery run to Trader Joe's, then took a rare detour over to Whole Foods. As a result -- even though it meant I didn't get home until 10pm -- rather than a slice of crappy takeout pizza, I am dining on fresh asparagus and caprese salad (using the basil I'm growing myself, on my porch). Aw yeah.

So, here's what I wanted to write about today:

I started reading The Simple Dollar ([livejournal.com profile] thesimpledollar) some months back, I think maybe via a citation from [livejournal.com profile] tapuz? Its main focus is partly frugality/simplicity and partly personal finance (i.e. fiscal responsibility), most of which boils down to Spend Less Than You Earn, No Really, over and over again. However, it's also got strong themes of personal productivity (he's a GTD disciple), writing as a practice, sensible childrearing, and general mindfulness. All of these elements seem worth keeping on my front burner, especially as I've been doing a lot of thoughtful money moving, planning, and budgeting myself since last September. I don't find all of his entries useful, but there are certainly enough tidbits of interest to make it worth skimming through the daily feed.

Here's a handful of entries I found memorable. (I was going to say "recent entries", but looking on the datestamps on them, I am reminded that one of his tricks is to post weekly "time machine" recaps of the best entries from one, two, three years ago that week. Clever? Thrifty!)

Eight personal-finance and -productivity books worth owning and regularly rereading:
http://www.thesimpledollar.com/2008/05/20/the-essential-bookshelf-the-only-eight-books-ive-kept-after-hundreds-of-reviews/

Five reasons that having a child isn’t as insanely expensive as you might think (relative, at least, to spendthrift single life!):
http://www.thesimpledollar.com/2007/10/18/five-reasons-why-having-a-child-isnt-as-expensive-as-you-might-think/

Make Your Own Cream-Of-____ Soup (really a no-brainer, but between having a kosher kitchen, and reviling all the additives and preservatives [and sodium!] in commercial canned soup, this is kind of a brilliant reminder):
http://www.thesimpledollar.com/2009/04/24/five-frugal-food-tactics-from-trents-kitchen/

Other useful links he's posted recently:
MissingMoney is a clearinghouse search site for all states with databases of unclaimed property. (It feels a little sketchy, but apparently it's entirely legit. You can also go straight to the National Association of Unclaimed Property Administrators site to do additional searching by state.)
The Cheapest Fruits and Vegetables Month-By-Month (on About.com)
Thinking Small without Guilt: Setting Your Minimum Goal Standards: "Rather than aiming for some maximum level of perfection, think small instead. Decide on a minimum standard which you'll have no excuses for not achieving."

And with that, perhaps to bed.
chanaleh: (jewish/poly)
I always think these posts will be "last one for a while", but there's just more coming up all the time. :-}

This whole Tiger Woods thing is causing a fair bit of commentary from the non-monogamy faction (much as the whole Bill Clinton thing did 12 years ago). But in particular, I couldn't not repost the one from my fandom object Jay Michaelson, to wit:
It's Not Just Tiger: Monogamous Marriage Is An Anomaly
"... Whatever we think about such normative questions, the facts of the matter are beyond dispute: monogamous marriage as an ideal that's actually meant to be upheld is a very recent, and not very successful, innovation."

Anyway. Moving on.

Some weeks back, [livejournal.com profile] ablock found me this paper, which is 10 years old, but still relevant:
What Psychology Professionals* Should Know About Polyamory
*Including, clearly, the one(s) consulted by my mother within the past three months.

Secondly, I read this NPR story earlier this year (though it dates from 2008). It made me cry the first time through, and has stuck with me incredibly over the past several months, though I had to go dig around a bit to find it again:
Two Families Grapple with Sons' Gender Preferences; Psychologists Take Radically Different Approaches in Therapy

What does this have to do with polyamory? Nothing, directly; but what it has to do with is the radical difference between hiding from your own -- or someone else's -- truth, and embracing it. So, um, this got long. )

FYI, the second article in the series is on transgendering puberty, here: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=90273278
chanaleh: (mandala)
I swear, someday soon I will write more actual content, but probably not until such time as I have functioning internets in my house. (Rather, it appears the internets themselves are functioning, but my new wireless card is not. Well, [livejournal.com profile] cycon is supposed to come to my rescue for a bit tonight, so we'll see if that helps!) But in the meantime, anyway...

Quick PSA that Honorable Menschen's next FREE Friends & Family concert is scheduled for Sunday afternoon, Dec. 13, 5pm at [livejournal.com profile] tremontstshul. (If you want an email reminder, sign up for our mailing list! :-) One of the new songs we're working on is "Reiach Tapuach", which I am totally loving; it's in 7/8 -- at least our arrangement is -- and the text, although modern, plays strongly on the language and imagery of Song of Songs. Yeah.

more happy fun linkage of interest )
chanaleh: (jewish/poly)
It occurred to me that I really should have started off my previous collection of links with the very basics, since this is a pretty radical (not to say unthinkable) concept to many of my lurking readers, particularly family members. *waves*

More on polyamory in general )
and in a Jewish context in particular )

Psych links

Wednesday, November 11th, 2009 06:29 pm
chanaleh: (shrink)
Though this is the sort of list some bloggers call "closing tabs"... in recent months, I have instead been keeping a little "clips" list of online articles of interest, in the interest of posting them (without overmuch additional comment) whenever I seem to have amassed a collection on a particular theme or topic. (I do this, like all my ongoing lists-in-progress these days, in a saved Gmail draft.)

These all happen to be on psychological topics, so here they are. )

With that, I'm off to do another moving run, and thence to birthday bowling.

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