grandparent news

Wednesday, April 4th, 2007 06:51 pm
chanaleh: (bell)
[personal profile] chanaleh
My grandmother is in the hospital, in California. They apparently aren't certain what's going on, but think she might have had another stroke on Saturday. (She had one about 13 years ago which left her in a wheelchair ever since with various impairments -- all physical, none mental, thank G-d. OTOH she's also gotten progressively more deaf and blind as the years have worn on.) Her blood pressure when they brought her in was something insane like 240/120.

She'll be 91 next Tuesday, April 10. At this point, they're not sure whether she will make it. :-/ She's certainly said for years already that she's perfectly ready to go, and most of us will concur that it's not really "too soon" in any sense. But I hate to know it's going on, my mom and my aunts having to cope, and I'm so far away.

GoogleMaps says Somerville, MA > Lodi, CA = 3,043 miles = about 45 hours' drive. Hmm.... (Yes, I could probably get a plane ticket, but it'd be nice to have my car at the other end. And I've always WANTED to drive cross-country...! I could do it in 3 days going out and take a little longer coming back; if I left Saturday morning, I could get there by Monday night, and I wouldn't technically have to get back any sooner than, like, April 20. Heh.)

Meanwhile, my dad is in Florida dealing with possible logistics for moving his parents out of their little retirement complex and into some kind of assisted living. A tough week all around.

... Otherwise, things more locally are reasonably good as Day 2 of Passover draws to an end. But more on that shortly.

Date: Wednesday, April 4th, 2007 11:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] palmwiz.livejournal.com
Flying and renting a car is cheaper than paying for gas. Even without the advance purchase, and even without a Saturday night stay.

Date: Wednesday, April 4th, 2007 11:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] besamim.livejournal.com
I'm sorry your grandmother is ill and wish her a refuah shleimah.

Date: Wednesday, April 4th, 2007 11:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mattblum.livejournal.com
Southwest has one-stop flights from both Manchester and Providence to Sacramento for pretty cheap.

I hope she recovers quickly.

Date: Wednesday, April 4th, 2007 11:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lauradi7.livejournal.com
I don't know you. Still, I'm offering advice. Take the plane. Go tomorrow. When my grandmother-in-law had a massive heart attack my mother-in-law told her sister (ie the other daughter of the grandmother) to keep driving (from NYC to Miami) instead of taking the next flight out. She got there an hour or two before Grandma died, but it would have been worth the plane nuisance and expense to have been able to spend another day or two with her.
Drive some other time.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 12:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] muchabstracted.livejournal.com
I'm sorry to hear that. I will wish for the best for your grandparents, all round, and for you. *hugs*

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 12:30 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] ken_r
I'm sorry to hear she's ill. I hope she recovers, but if not... well, I hope you're there in time.

The other posters are right. Fly now, think about driving some other time. If the doctors aren't sure if she's going to make it to Tuesday, don't make plans that'll get you there, probably exhausted, on Monday night.

My best wishes to both of you.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 12:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kimberlogic.livejournal.com
Southwest or Jet Blue might have cheaper options - and if you need a ride to Manchester or Providence (cheaper to fly from there), I'm happy to give you one any time before I leave on Sunday.

I wish you and your family much strength and kindness.

*hugs*

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 03:24 am (UTC)
ckd: small blue foam shark (Default)
From: [personal profile] ckd
Also, for last minute flight/car or flight/hotel runs, check site59.com. It's a better deal if there are two of you going, but it may still be worth doing. Right now, it's giving me BOS-OAK leaving on Thurs (April 5, tomorrow as I write this) and returning on Weds, April 11 for $686 including the car, for one person.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 03:25 am (UTC)
ckd: two white candles on a dark background (candles)
From: [personal profile] ckd
Best wishes for your grandmother.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 03:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vettecat.livejournal.com
Hope she's OK!

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 03:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geoffroi.livejournal.com
I've driven cross-country, and it's pretty hard work, especially solo. I was really stir-crazy by the time I made it to LA. I'd say fly if you can. I'll keep your grandmother and your family in my prayers...

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 03:38 am (UTC)
bluepapercup: (doormouse)
From: [personal profile] bluepapercup
Good luck dealing with it all. If you want to drive to Cali, I think you should. This is a GREAT time of year for it.

My thoughts go out to your gram, and your whole family.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 04:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bikergeek.livejournal.com
I second the suggestion to take a plane. I'd love to do a cross-country road trip some time, but I'd rather it were on a motorcycle, with no specific route or ETA...and if I were in a car, doing it by interstate, I'd want a copilot.

Good luck to your grandmother. And to you and yours, for coping with whatever happens.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 10:23 am (UTC)

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 01:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meranthi.livejournal.com
*HUG*

Driving cross country is tiring. I drove every year from here to CO for the summer. Unless you are very good at staying awake when you're tired, I wouldn't recommend driving for 3 days straight. I drove from Cincinatti to here in 36 hours and was just about dead at the end of that.

(Feel free to ignore this advice if you don't want to hear it right now.)

My grandma died when my parents were both here. My dad was on the first flight out and still didn't make it in time... Go while you can, if it looks bad.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 02:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msmidge.livejournal.com
Ditto. Plus, why do something you've always wanted to do at a time when you're bound to feel sad and stressed out at least some of the time? Maybe you'd have more fun on the drive if you saved it for a happier time.

Strength and comfort to all of your family.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] koshmom.livejournal.com
I also ditto the "take a plane" people. Besides gas being $$$, remember that once you get there with your car, you will have to DRIVE BACK as well. Only half the trip's over. And if driving there ended up being not that much fun, you'd have a whole 3 more days of that unfun driving to do to get home.

There's plenty of "rent-a-wreck" places out there, you don't need to go Avis and spend lots of money.

one note about driving cross country (I did once, east to west, when I moved there years ago). You have to Call Ahead and Reserve sleeping accomodations if you want to stay in a motel enroute once you get west of Chicago. And there's really Nothing To See in the middle of the USA. It's a Very Large Country.

If you do drive, I recommend books on tape/CD. There's little to no radio reception except for Country music or local news west of Chicago.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 03:50 pm (UTC)
drwex: (Default)
From: [personal profile] drwex
My sympathies on the situation. Don't know that there's much more to say, but I'm hoping it doesn't hit too hard, whatever the future holds.

Hard work?

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 04:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ariwriter.livejournal.com
How so? If you're racing against time, granted. But if you're driving around the country for no other purpose than to drive, aka the true definition of roadtripping, there is no greater purity.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 04:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chanaleh.livejournal.com
Thanks. I've been thinking of you and your dad as well. Neglected to bring the name for misheberach, on yomtov -- but I always try to direct healing thoughts on the person's behalf while the blessings are being made, if I don't have the correct name handy.

*hugs*

Re: Hard work?

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 04:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chanaleh.livejournal.com
I think "racing against time" was the relevant factor, yes.

Re: Hard work?

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 04:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geoffroi.livejournal.com
Yeah, it's the racing against time bit. Getting up every day knowing you have to clock another 800-1000 miles sucked...

Roadtripping when time doesn't matter is a totally different beast.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 05:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] besamim.livejournal.com
Thanks back atcha. Don't worry about the name bit; knowing my friends wish my dad well is enough.

Date: Thursday, April 5th, 2007 07:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gosling.livejournal.com
Much, much sympathy. *hugs*

(I agree with all the folks who are saying that it is best to fly.)

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