Bread & Circus has the cure for what ails me

[chanaleh]

Ignatia amara is the homeopathic remedy for crying jags. (Actually, the label indications say "stress and grief". I think that's wonderfully apt.) Whether or not you think homeopathy is utter nonsense, I have found that this one does seem to help.

Memo to self: Take some before going out in public (e.g., shul yesterday) when it seems prudent.

Comments

[sunspiral.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Not sure what's going on, but I hope it gets better. Also, there have been a couple of interesting articles recently that may point the way to explaining how Homeopathy works. The official explanation sounds ridiculous, but our household experiences with it have been very positive.

[chanaleh.livejournal.com]

Not sure what's going on, but I hope it gets better.

Thanks. Just the usual, really. I mean, I find myself crying on and off a fair bit of the time these days (actually, for some months now, I suppose). Some days I'm basically fine and can handle whatever's going on... and other days I feel like a human skin stretched thin over an abyss of pain.

And it's more like general sadness over things than any one thing happening, if you know what I mean. I should have known I was in for trouble when I was trying to learn my Torah reading in the morning and my concentration kept getting sidetracked on tear-inducing thoughts. Then I got to shul and found that I was still getting similarly sidetracked. And just when I was pulling it together, it turned out there was a baby-naming, and then another couple that are my friends announced they were expecting, and, well...

I think what weighs on me is not just the fact that I don't yet have those things in my life (partner, permanent home, babies on the way); it's more that I feel so far from even being able to see my path to get there.

It's not actually all that unusual for me to sit through services or kiddush being all weepy to myself -- at least, it's happened a couple times before, and usually no one really thinks anything of it, or at least doesn't say anything, like this time. Except for dear queendeb, but I think she thought I might be watery from cold/allergy symptoms rather than weepiness, and then I kind of shunted it aside when she asked. :-/

a couple of interesting articles recently that may point the way to explaining how Homeopathy works.

I'd be interested to see those. Are they online?

[hammercock.livejournal.com]

Aw...*hugs*

How long has this been going on now? You're seeing a therapist, right? Have you told your therapist about how you've been feeling?

I think what weighs on me is not just the fact that I don't yet have those things in my life (partner, permanent home, babies on the way); it's more that I feel so far from even being able to see my path to get there.

I hear you on that. That was something that weighed on me to some degree with CZ, actually. I was happy with him, yet I knew that I couldn't have those things with him. I envied what he had with his wife, because I wanted those things with someone who was available to me in that way. *sigh*

You know what, though? You're not all dried up, and neither am I. :-} We will find what we want, I'm sure.

[chanaleh.livejournal.com]

You're seeing a therapist, right? Have you told your therapist about how you've been feeling?

Oh, yeah. Talk, talk, talk. I cry about it all in there every week. Don't know if I have discussed how pervasive the feelings can be, though. I do get tired of carrying the tears around so close to the surface. (I fear it may start to wig C out a bit how I cry practically every time I'm with him. :-} He cares, though, and tries to root out the problem, insofar as I will let him. And I'm always afraid to bring any of that stuff out on him... but it does feel somewhat better afterwards.)

You're not all dried up, and neither am I.

*grin* Keep reminding me (and I'll remind you!).

[queendeb.livejournal.com]

well
i have noticed before
and
you were singing at the same time as you were crying
and i was sitting right *there*
and i didn't want to pry
but i didn't want it
to be unnoticed...

Re:

[sunspiral.livejournal.com]

Wow, it sounds like you're fresh out of cope. Kindly old uncle Scott recommends getting checked for organic depression. Plus, as soon as Baitcon and the Summer Party are done with, we should finally get you over here for dinner.

The articles in question (which are not without controversy) were in New Scientist. Go to their website and search with keyword "homeopathy" to see them.

[chanaleh.livejournal.com]

Mmmm. You're so cute when you're being avuncular. ;-)

But I would so, so love to come over for dinner. Would you also invite that cute guy from Arisia concom that you occasionally go rockclimbing with?

Re:

[sunspiral.livejournal.com]

You mean the one who wears a utilikilt? Sure. Then he and Rachel will go smoff, and we can chat.

[chanaleh.livejournal.com]

Sounds like the picture of domestic bliss to me. :-)

[laurens10.livejournal.com]

Some days I'm basically fine and can handle whatever's going on... and other days I feel like a human skin stretched thin over an abyss of pain.

...I'm glad that you are trying to take care of yourself. I've been where you are emotionally many times, and I wish I had some advice that wouldn't sound trite and superficial.... *hug*

[tapuz.livejournal.com]

fwiw...
We all take our own paths towards getting where we need to be.
Just because there are breadcrumbs to follow does not necessarily make the process any easier or qualitatively better.
(I hope that was coherent!)

[navrins]

*waves hands kinda helplessly*

I care.

Can't think of anything more specific to say that I haven't already said to you in person, but... I care.

[chanaleh.livejournal.com]

*big hugs* On the one hand -- I know. On the other, I really do appreciate being reminded.