A la David Letterman...

[chanaleh]

I wrote this a few years ago around this time to send to my brother, and figured I might as well resurrect trot it out again.


** THE TOP TEN REASONS WHY PEOPLE EAT HAM ON EASTER**

10. Commemorates Biblical sacrifice of the Paschal lamb -- some idiot thought they said "Paschal-HAM"

#9. Back when Jews outnumbered Christians, it was the only meat you could get cheaply at Passover time

#8. Baby chickies still too small to roast

#7. Pink color coordinates best with pastel table linens

#6. Two words: pineapple glaze

#5. Spiral slicing just so darn convenient

#4. Ham-and-egg connection so strong in people's minds, Easter eggs just seem lonely without it

#3. Folkloric tradition that pigs resurrect after three days -- just like Jesus

#2. Easter Bunny's PR staff successfully drove out the original standard: rabbit stew

AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON FOR EATING EASTER HAM....

#1. Religious backlash: "Hey, check this out -- Easter means we're not Jewish anymore!"

Comments

[laurens10.livejournal.com]

I love #3! Pigs of the Undead!

[klingonlandlady.livejournal.com]

*snerk!* Thanks for sharing!

[bethr.livejournal.com]

Schwa! I really needed that this morning. thanks hon, for sharing.

*lol*

[adamosity.livejournal.com]

That sounds like David Letterman, even though I liked the Late Night version at 12:30 better then the CBS mess of the last decade.

A total sign of my lack of heavily practicing Judaism--I'm going over a family friend's house later today (probably) for a large dinner (nonreligious, though), and she'll probably serve a honeybaked ham *lol*

--adam

Ham? I'm having a pork chop.

[beardedone.livejournal.com]

Of course, the reason I'm having a pork chop today is that I had steak and shrimp last night, and chicken on Friday.

The one good thing about Easter (which I do not celebrate in any way, shape, or fashion, due to my non-belief in any religious entities, religions, or spiritual movements) is that you can go grocery shopping at nine in the morning on a Sunday, get the items that are sale with coupons, that normally sell out shortly after eight. There are very few people shopping at that time. ^_^

Of course, I don't celebrate Passover either, so I'm not overwhelmed with matzo. (As a courtesy to others, I have not posted my seafood bisque recipe, which involves lobsters, crab, shrimp, and scallops, mixed with milk. How treif can I go?)

Happy holidays to those of you of the religious bent.

Re: Ham? I'm having a pork chop.

[chanaleh.livejournal.com]

which involves lobsters, crab, shrimp, and scallops, mixed with milk.

Actually, mixing milk with seafood does not make it any "more" treyf. (I mean, the question of intuitive "degrees" of treyfness is a separate one, since halachically either food is kosher or it ain't -- but anyway.) Fish are not considered meat, they're pareve, so combining them with dairy is no problem. Fish chowder made with milk or cream (and, of course, kosher varieties of fish) is perfectly okay.

Anyway, happy spring! :-P

[katfairy.livejournal.com]

Actually, #1 sounds a little too plausible....

We had turkey. I'm refraining from making the obvious jokes.

[memerath.livejournal.com]

#8 made me laugh out loud. :) I can picture the little roast chickies lined up in the pan like spatchcocks (sp?)...

[bluepapercup]

Actually, I just eat my baby chickes raw. They're so easy to hold and so fun to pet, and then you get to bit their heads off! Easy breakfast!

[donnad.livejournal.com]

My mother used to make ham for Easter all the time, until she realized that out of everyone in the family, only two people (her and I) actually *like* ham. Everyone else just ate it to be nice. This year, she cooked a turkey.

And Yes, Pineapple glaze...with cloves, marachino cherries and chunks of pineapple... MMmmm..

[besamim.livejournal.com]

Folkloric tradition that pigs resurrect after three days

If that were true, then we Jewish folk could eat pork, in anticipation of the Resurrection of the Dead. Woohoo!

I'm reminded of a baal teshuvah acquaintance, from my undergrad days, who told me in all seriousness that the Third Meal on Shabbat is important because it nourishes your luz bone, this being the (supposed) bone at the base of the spine from which we'll be resurrected.

"Uh huh," I said at the time, and nodded politely. (Back away, don't make eye contact...)

[evelio.livejournal.com]

I never had ham on easter. In fact I don't have Ham on Christmar, or Thanksgiving. Ham is meant to be sliced and on sandwiches. But I had never heard of an Easter Dinner. I'd heard about Easter Sunday Mass. Oh I need to LJ about the Mass experience I had.